75+ Funny One Liners Quotes and Captions

75+ Funny One Liners Quotes and Captions

Funny one liners

This article features the best funny one liners captions for you.

They are short and onto the point making them an ideal fun game for kids and a good place where you can get your Instagram or photo captions.

If you are looking for a list of simple yet unique and crazy funny one liners, you are in the right place.

Dive into the categories below and make sure to add more of your own in the comments below.

Let’s get started.

Best One Liners

1. They say money talks but mine can only say goodbye.

2. When I say I am a bad electrician somebody gets shocked and my community still wonders why.

3. I asked her why she drew the eyebrows that high and she seems surprised!

4. A toad in a tank asked his friend, “can you drink this thing?”

5. I went to the lab to ask why stool test results were taking this long and the nurse asked if I thought they were stealing my stool.

6. Why did the doctor say I suffer from alcoholism when I enjoy every sip?

7. Don’t you hate it when people answer their questions every time? I do.

8. Is this how we make ends meat?

9. Don’t read this part backward. It is a trap.

10. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, my love. But don’t worry, it is at the bottom of the things I want to do.

11. It is confirmed that taller people sleep longer.

12. It was chasing its tail trying to make both ends meet.

13. What type of salt is a somersault?

14. Volcanic mountains are more lava-ble than their fold mountains counterparts.

15. The music recorded by NASA in space must be Nep-tunes.

Clever One Liners

16. I doughnot belong here.

17. Lettuce get out of here.

18. You must be a weirdough.

19. Is money is the route to evil in the world?

20. This is how we make ends meat.

21. I have so mushroom for love in my heart.

22. You must be the im-pasta.

23. I don’t be-leaf any word you say.

24. It is Fry-day yet? Why the chips?

25. Cheesus crust, you scare me!

Funny One Liners Puns

26. Water you doing there?

27. We need peas of mind.

28. You seem gouda for each other.

29. These are nacho your favorite one-liners.

30. Donut even think of leaving me alone.

31. Avast majority of the software is vulnerable.

32. If you go on ice cream, just stop!

33. Is that the cereal killer?

34. My heart beets for you every day.

35. You are a peeling by the way.

Crazy One Liners About Life

36. I am your biggest fun.

37. All you need in life sometimes is gouda luck.

38. How have you bean?

39. You can kale me using this number.

40. We will be in Kale-fornia over the weekend.

41. I feel like I am eel.

42. Do not lick my secrets to my enemy.

43. That’s kinda big dill.

44. We can ketchup later in the afternoon.

45. Can you check the thyme for me?

One Liners Quotes for Instagram Captions

46. I don’t carrot all.

47. I am trying to make ends meat.

48. Just cut the cheese, I am tired of these mind games.

49. I had an eggcellent day at work.

50. I knead help making the break.

51. That is a waist of money and resources.

52. He broke my hut and our marriage.

53. Our geology class rocks.

54. Sounds like a mummy to his children.

55. Why does it sound like proper-gander?

Sarcastic One Liners Jokes

56. They always a-maize me.

57. Let’s taco about the direction of our relationship.

58. I miss you a latte these days.

59. I don’t feel any butter since you hurt me.

60. In queso you don’t hear from me, just know am gone for good.

61. Do electronics take their drinks with micro-chips?

62. I have bean in such a mess before.

63. I loaf you guys a latte.

64. I got it from a reliable sauce and I trust it.

65. I am a little corn-fused here, what did you just say?

Hilarious One Liners for Kids

66. I am the wheaty and clever one they say I am.

67. I yam who they say I yam.

68. Did you planet or it just happened by chance?

69. There are no people with long hair in Berberdos.

70. Adelle sailed to China just to say hello on the other side.

71. February can’t March but April May.

72. Ancient Romans used Ceasar to trim their hair.

73. Long fairy tales dragon for hours.

74. Do penguins have aunts? Yes, who do you think aunt Arctica is?

75. In the dark ages, there were more knights than we have these days.

Funny One-Liners

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