75 Fish Jokes that Will Throw You Off the Scale

75 Fish Jokes that Will Throw You Off the Scale

Fish Jokes Image

Everyone loves good jokes. Infact, kids love jokes more than anyone else.

And, that makes cracking jokes and telling puns a fundamental part of activities to keep them busy and engaged in the house.

Not all jokes hit the same and having wide variety to choose from must be the goal of every person.

In this article, we have come up with a list of cute fish jokes for you to play with and have fun.

They are a wonderful addition to dad jokes, yo mama jokes or “what do you call” type of jokes.

Funny Fish Jokes

1. Why was the fish asked to repeat the exams?

His grades were below sea level.

2. Why did the fish go to the hospital?

It was feeling eel.

3. What does every young male fish want?

A good gill-friend.

4. Which fish only comes out at night?

The star-fish.

5. How do you measure a fish’s weight?

By their scales.

6. How do you get a good first impression of a fish?

Drop a pick-up line.

7. What did the fish say to his children?

“Keep your mouths shut and you won’t get caught.”

8. When does a fish not trust each other’s advice?

When the advice sounds fishy.

9. What happens when a fish goes out for a date?

They get hooked up.

10. What do piranhas eat with their sandwich?

The jellyfish.

11. Bartender: What can I get for you?

Fish: Water! I need water.

12. Why was there a fight at the fish market?

One fish got battered and the rest of them were not happy.

13. What do fish in the ocean dance to?

A tune-a.

14. What did the sardines say when they swam into a wall by the river?

“Dam!”

15. Where do fish keep their savings?

At the river bank.

16. What do we call the most famous fish in the ocean?

A star-fish.

17. Why didn’t the fish dealer sign the deal?

He felt something was fishy about the whole thing.

18. What did the shark say after tasting the clownfish?

“It tastes a little bit funny.”

19. Why did the fish cross the ocean?

He wanted to show that he is not a chicken.

20. Which fish has musical talent?

A tune-a.

21. What did one fish say to the other?

“You are very so-fish-sticated my friend.”

22. What did the otter eat for dinner?

Fish and chips.

23. Why did the dog jump into the sea?

He saw a catfish.

24. What music do fishermen listen to?

Catchy music.

25. Why can’t you trust fish suppliers?

Their deals are often fishy.

26. Two fish were in the tank and one turned into the other and asked,

“How do we drive this thing?”

27. When the fish goes to church, what do they listen to?

The salmon.

28. Why did the naughty fish blush?

She saw the ocean bottom.

29. Why did the shrimp keep everything to itself?

Because it was a shellfish.

30. Why are fish in the ocean healthier than fish in ponds?

Vitamin sea is good for them.

31. What do we call the study of fish?

Fish-iology.

32. Why are fishermen often held in high regard?

Fishermen are reel men.

33. What makes a piano different from a fish?

You can tune a piano but you cannot tuna fish.

34. My three years old caught a fish.

Someone threw it at him.

35. What do you call a fish with money?

A goldfish.

36. How many tickles will it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten-tickles.

37. Why can’t fish play basketball?

They are afraid of the net.

38. I visited a sale at the fish auction today.

I wanted to see what the catch was.

39. Which fish eats rats?

A catfish.

40. Where do sharks go for their honeymoon?

Finland.

41. What is an ancient pirate’s favorite fish?

The swordfish.

42. Why do fish swim in schools?

Because they cannot walk.

43. I made some fish tacos yesterday and guess what?

They swam past them!

44. What is the least favorite day of the week for the fish?

Frydays.

45. How do you capture a fish’s attention?

Make your proposal catchy.

46. What do you call a fish that does surgeries?

A sturgeon.

47. What do we call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh.

48. What do you call predatory fish lending money?

A loan shark!

49. Why is fishing a good business venture?

The net profit is good.

50. The big fish swam like a bass, intimidating any other that wanted to outcompete him.

51. John: Is this river good for a trout?

Fisherman: I guess so and might be part of the reason I can’t catch any.

52. What spells death to fish and fisherman’s way of life?

An accidental nuclear fish-ion at the sea.

53. What do you call a fish with two knees?

Tunyfish.

54. How do you a fish party is over?

When it is fin-ished!

55. Why do scientists consider a fish IQ average?

Most fish get a sea.

56. Why are some fish scared of the deep sea?

They don’t want to live at the ocean bottom.

57. What happens when you offend a fish?

You get schooled.

58. What did the scared fish say?

“Oh, My Cod!” (OMC)

59. What happens when turtles disappear from the sea?

It will be a turtle disaster!

60. How do you stop a fish from smelling?

You chop its nose.

61. What is the best fish tool in the sea?

The hammerhead shark.

62. Who grants others their fish wish?

The cod mother.

63. How do you make a fish old?

Take out the “G” and you get oldfish.

64. What did the fish score in their last test?

A sea plus.

65. Why was the fish’s mouth wide open?

It was sharked by what it saw.

66. My baby doesn’t like fish. What can I replace it with?

A cat. Because cats like fish.

67. What do you call a fish that tells stupid fish jokes?

A dumb bass.

68. What do you call a singer fish?

A tuna.

69. Where do fish sleep?

In the river bed.

70. How do you make a goldfish old?

Remove the “G” and “fish” from its name and you get old.

71. What do you call a group of singing fish in a church?

Choral reef.

72. Why are the sharks abandoning their hunt for fish?

They are scale-ing back their operations.

73. I learned about the goldfish that went bankrupt.

He is now a silverfish.

74. What do you call when two fishermen kiss on the boat?

Row-mance.

75. What do you call a fish that doesn’t want to see the other succeed?

Gill-ty.

Fish Jokes.

The Smartbackyard