Are you looking for the coolest and funniest cow jokes to add to your fun?

This article has some of the best clean jokes for you that you can use for your afternoon fun with friends or family.

Most of the cow jokes, puns and one-liners in this article are short and on to the point; making them ideal for kids as young as 12 years old.

If you have been searching for good cow jokes and puns for your Q and A night, we’ve got you covered.

Funny Cow Jokes

1. Why do bulls fight every time they meet other new bulls?

They always have beef.

2. What do we call cows that spy on others?

Udder-cover cows.

3. What do cows do in their free time?

They listen to fairy tails.

4. What did the cow say to its calf before going to the field to graze?


5. What do we call a cow that sheds its coat several times in a year?

A cow-moo-flage.

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6. Why don’t we have shoes for cows?

It’s difficult to make their shoes because they lactose.

7. Where do cows go to gamble with their money?

In the cow-cino.

8. What do you get when you pamper a cow too much?

Spoilt milk.

9. What do you call a cow grazing in your backyard?

A lawn moo-wer.

10. Which American city had the most cows back in the day?

Horn-olulu, Hawaii.

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11. What happened to the bull-ish heifer?

The farmer cut its horns.

12. Why are male cows sometimes rough on people and other cows?

Because they are bull-y.

13. Which crop do cows love to grow?


14. Why do people from Europe love cows that much?

Because they are cow-casians.

15. Which State is a cow likely to visit the last?


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16. Which cow dances salsa the best?

The one with the best moo-ves.

17. What did the royal cows say to the bull after winning the fight?

That is no-bull of you.

18. When do we tie bells to a cow?

When their horns don’t work any-moo.

19. What did the cow say to the farmer after being given a salt bar to lick?


20. What is the name of the cow that does magic?


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Romantic Cow Jokes

21. Man.ure hotter than all men in here and I would wish to have a guy like you.

22. Cud you be my girl for life?

23. I will always consider her.bivore any other girl out there.

24. We watched romantic moo-vies over the

25. Moo to our love and life to come.

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Cow Puns

26. Africow is where cows were domesticated for the first time.

27. Heifer are we from the destination?

28. Who were the moos that occupied southern parts of Europe?

29. Have you herd about the new ranch?

30. Welcome to the United States of Americow.

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31. What do we call a noble cow?

Sir Loin.

32. What was the cow’s complaint to his master?

I feel like am seen but never herd.

33. Why were there too many cows at the event?

To beef up the security.

34. What do you call a cow that sleeps too much?

A bull dozer.

35. Roost beef is what you get after crossbreeding a cow and a rooster.

36. The shop is infamous for cow-nterfeit goods.

37. She was not a-moo-sed by his theatrics.

38. The steaks are high. We are likely to win this game.

39. Why don’t bulls like cow jokes and cow puns?

They felt like the jokes butchered them.

40. Holy cow! These cow puns and cow jokes are nailing it.

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41. Move. Get out of the w-hay.

42. What do we call a cow that is fearful of everything?

A cow-ard.

43. What is the issue with cow-ards?

They don’t have the bulls to face the reality.

44. I know you love me but not as moo-ch as I love you.

45. I am udderly in love with the way you treat me.

Cow One-Liners

46. She was moo-dy the whole of yesterday.

47. He is a cow-heard. He can do nothing.

48. Always listen to good moo-sic and not the stuff played on our airwaves these days.

49. Spare the cow and spoil the milk!

50. Go pasture emotions and petty feelings and you will always win in life.

Silly cow jokes